by Robbin Montero
If you are irritable and grouchy with everyone, including your fiancé, it¿s time to get a grip and get back into control of yourself before you turn into “Bridezilla”.

            Uh oh. The “Big Day” is almost here. You aren’t sleeping or maintaining focus at work. If you are irritable and grouchy with everyone, including your fiancé, it’s time to get a grip and get back into control of yourself before you turn into “Bridezilla”.

            You want to look and feel your best on your wedding day in order to enjoy it. And, you don’t want guests picking up that you are stressed. Here are some ideas to make sure you are a beauty and not a beast on that big day.


1.      Consider hiring a wedding planner. They can alleviate doubts, answer questions, and avoid potential pitfalls that occur when inexperienced couples attempt to negotiate with vendors but without wedding industry knowledge. After all, weddings can involve as many as two dozen vendors–do you want to field all those calls the last few days? The planner will handle the details and the vendors, coordinate the wedding ceremony and reception, and assure they run smoothly so you won’t have to worry. You and your family will breathe a collective sigh of relief and enjoy the day if the details are in the capable hands of a planner.

2.      Start an exercise program or join a yoga class. This also helps to relieve stress and will aid you in getting a good night’s sleep. Or, consider long walks. If you have a dog, you and your pet will both benefit from a brisk daily stroll in the neighborhood or in a park. Exercise is good for the complexion, as well as the figure and spirit.

3.      Enjoy lunch and a spa day with a special girlfriend. Pamper yourself with a facial, massage, pedicure–the works!

4.      If you are prone to becoming nervous during down time and worrying about the wedding details, use the time to be better prepared.  Organize your kitchen cabinets or a photo album. Clean out your clothes closet and donate items you aren’t wearing. These projects will distract you while helping you prepare for moving or other changes to come.

5.      Being reasonably well-organized in your approach to the wedding also helps keep stress in check. Don’t become obsessive but, if you don’t have a wedding planner, set up time lines and plan ahead. Organized people also find it easier to delegate. Identify responsibilities you can delegate to others outside the bridal party. Your bridesmaids may already have plenty of duties on the day of the wedding.

6.      Plan something fun. You have appointments and meetings you have to keep, but don’t forget life’s small pleasures. Have lunch with your fiancé and make a point of talking about something other than the wedding.  Go window-shopping.  Enjoy a movie with friends. 

7.      Relieve stress on the morning of the wedding by setting aside some time to sit quietly by yourself, away from the chaos that is inherent in the morning’s wedding preparations. Visualize your day. Have a cup of coffee or tea. Eat a good, healthy breakfast. Then, just think about your whole day and how it will unfold. This visualization will help relax you.

8.      Practice relaxation and breathing techniques in the weeks before the wedding. If you feel yourself becoming anxious during the wedding day, breathe deeply, fully inhaling and exhaling, to calm yourself.


            If you feel stressed about your wedding, remember what the day is really all about. You’re marrying the person you love, the person with whom you want to spend the rest of your life. Keeping that in mind often helps give brides perspective on little things that might not be perfect or which are beyond her power to change.


 “Stress Free, Leave the Details to Me,” is the tried and true philosophy of Robbin Montero, California Wine Country wedding planning expert and owner of A Dream Wedding.  Robbin is the premier wedding planner in the Northern California Wine Country, transforming any vision into the perfectly designed wedding creation. Robbin and her weddings have been featured in The Knot, Brides, Elite Magazine, Your Wedding Day and Vine Napa/Sonoma magazines, and Travel & Leisure magazine calls Robbin, “The expert wedding planner in the California Wine Country.” 

©2009 Robbin Montero


This article cannot be reprinted without Robbin Montero’s expressed written permission.

Robbin Montero is a wedding coordinator and special events planner in Northern California.

©2006 Robbin Montero
This article cannot be reprinted without Robbin Montero's expressed written permission.